Gettin' Dirty

Omegle conversation log

2011-09-23

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: m or f

You: salutations!

You: f

You: hbu

You: :)

Stranger: wanna ride my penis

You: wanna wax my hair

Stranger: i want you send me a pic of your boobs

You: i got the goods

You: aka

You: the higher ends in this bargain

You: send me your penis

You: now

Stranger: mv*******@textfree.us

You: wtf is that

Stranger: send me a pic there and youll get one back

You: hehe no

You: that's not the deal buddy ;)

Stranger: i want your vagina

You: and i want CBT

You: but

Stranger: but what

You: that's the way it is

You: here

You: i'll send you a pic of me

You: getting dirty

Stranger: do it

Stranger: text me 1864-***-2741

Stranger: ill lick your vagian

You: http://5z8.info/snufffilms_l2n8yi_protocols-of-the-elders-of-zion.doc

You: I'm so dirty in this

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Crossing Guard

Omegle conversation log

2011-04-02

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.

You: hi

Stranger: hey there

You: how are thigns

You: things*'

Stranger: ^_^ pretty good!

Stranger: What about you?

You: im alright, finally caught up on sleep

Stranger: Ahhh, I wish I could say the same

Stranger: Should be sleeping now... >.>

You: lol why don't you

Stranger: Because I'm a night owl and my body hates me lol

You: ah i understand

Stranger: Yep.

Stranger: Doesn't help when you're day job requires you to be active

You: lol what day job doesn't require one to be active?

Stranger: ... Crossing guard

You: idk one time i crossed against the light and the crossing lady chased me down

You: used mace and everything

Stranger: Whoa! What did you do to make her chase you?

You: well

You: on top of disobeying her ordering me not to cross the street, i flipped her off in the middle of the street. while this was happening, two cars t-boned each other at the major intersection she was supposed to be guarding while others were crossing

Stranger: O.O Yep, definitely a reason to break out the mace.

You: o yea

Stranger: Guessing you didn't cross there from then on?

You: nah i went back the next day and she wasn't there

You: ....ever again

Stranger: ... What did you DO!? lol

You: raped that bitch, cleansed her soul

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

BDSM

Omegle conversation log

2011-04-01

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.

You: hi

Stranger: Hello.

Stranger: I am a gay male from the USA looking for other males interested in BDSM.

You: what does that acronym represent

Stranger: bondage, discipline, sadism, masochism

You: ah nice

Stranger: It is quite.

You: i too enjoy bonding, disciplining, being sadistic, and provoking masochism among the underbelly of society with my Nazi brothers

You: we are quite alike

Stranger: I see.

Stranger: Shall we nazi together?

You: heil, ho! heil, ho! it's off to persecute we go!

Stranger: -links arms-

You: walking off into the sunset

You: exterminating as we go along

You: and buttfuck by candlelight

Stranger: This sounds like a wonderful lifestyle.

You: i can't wait

Stranger: Indeed.

You have disconnected.

Some Sick Shit

Omegle conversation log

2011-03-04

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.

Stranger: i

Stranger: hi

Stranger: m

Stranger: u

You: f

You: u

Stranger: min usa

Stranger: in usa

You: same

Stranger: kool im in cali you

Stranger: u

You: illinois

Stranger: sweet

Stranger: alone too?

You: yeah

You: y does that matter ;)

Stranger: me too

Stranger: just horny wonderin biut you

You: horny too

Stranger: sweeeeeet

You: ikr

Stranger: im in bed with a laptop

Stranger: y

Stranger: ou

You: same!!

Stranger: damn girl

Stranger: u wanna have sum fun too

You: sure

You: what exactly do you do for fun?

Stranger: yur looks?

You: brunette

Stranger: girls girls girls

You: 5'11

You: and you

Stranger: 6-2

Stranger: brn hr

You: coolio

You: now that we got to know each other

You: i suggest we get to the action

Stranger: k

Stranger: u 1st

You: nooooooooooooo

You: u

You: ;)

Stranger: so what do u have on ?

You: my pajamas

You: and you

Stranger: boxers

You: but there's a hole in my pjs that should cover my butthole

Stranger: ahhhh rear access only p j s

You: yeah amazon got my order confused with someone else's :p

Stranger: left u with a kold ass

You: ikr

You: and i need something warm

You: that's why ive been in bed

Stranger: any toys with you in bed

You: no amazon hasn't FUCKING shipped them yet

You: :(

You: [dw im not mad @ u]

Stranger: ok just a lil cream will do then u got that

You: what kind of cream

You: w/e

Stranger: any kind

You: just stick it in my ass

You: ;)

Stranger: yep

You: oh

You: so

You: deep

Stranger: fingers only?

You: whole penis

You: balls deep

You: baby

Stranger: then the pussy

You: eventually

You: ;)

You: we'll delve into that ravine

You: very soon

Stranger: i gtg pee

Stranger: i ll be back

You: just pee in me

You: ;)

You: inside

You: ahhh it's dripping wet

Stranger: k

You: good thing i didn't poo. looks like you're gonna do some plumbing down there hehe :) awww yea you hit the spot right there, i just flush out all my shit right on your dick. it looks like we got this big brown mudpile in the bed. omg im just spreading myself all over it getting all messy.then you grab a chunk of my poo and use it as a lube to fire yourself back up again. you fuck me harder and harder with poop remnants still sliding all over your balls and getting matted in our pubic hairs. omg im gonna cum. im gonna...im gonna!!!!! OAOAOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH yea

Stranger: k

You: btw I'm a guy

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Whitest Argument...EVER

Be warned: this is quite possibly the whitest argument I encountered through my use of Omegle.com. The posts have been scarce due to the semester's busyness. There will be more soon! (If anyone still cares)

Omegle conversation log

2011-02-13

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.

You: sup

Stranger: Hello

You: how are things?

Stranger: Nothing much, you>

Stranger: ?

You: same on this end

You: nothing too much is up

You: except

You: lol

You: my friend is absolutely crazy

Stranger: why?

You: he's convinced that another friend of mine is brainwashing him

You: it's hysterical

Stranger: Drugs are bad, M'Kay?

You: ....

You: um yea sure

Stranger: M'kay

You: thanks for the random south park reference

Stranger: It's no problem Childeren

You: you're so goddamn funny

Stranger: No I'm not, stop lying, it'll send you straight to hell

You: you just - what's the phrase? - "keep, 'em comin'"

Stranger: Whats your name my good man?

Stranger: Indeed

You: joe

You: what is your name?

You: oh i know it

You: it's faggot

Stranger: Well Joe, what's your profession, and please don't say Plumber

Stranger: Actually it's pronounced "Fag-Ouh" but whatever

You: my profession? mechanical engineer

You: woooooo

You: w

You: the whole denial thing

You: really

You: doesn't work

You: but w/e

You: i'll let the stupidity ramble

Stranger: Stupidity, I haven't the foggiest idea what your talking about?

You: by that sentence construction you have inadvertently proven your stupidity in numbers

Stranger: By your lack of punctuation, capitalization and grammatical skill, I'd say you did the same...

Stranger: ...and so we meet an impass.

You: it really took you a long time to come up with that retort

Stranger: It took you an equally long time for your reply, problem?

You: haha you're telling me about punctuation?

You: you don't even end your sentences with periods

Stranger: Neither do you...sir.

You: i never said i did, ma'am

Stranger: Plus, most of these aren't sentences, they're statements, and questions.

Stranger: Please, at least capitalize "I", it takes so little effort to do, and it looks so much better.

You: if you make a statement, then the end of it belongs a period (.), should you want to be grammatically correct 24/7

You: you're not worth the effort

Stranger: That's what your father said when he left

Stranger: *zing*

You: no matter how little it may be (twss)

You: i implore you to not bring our parents into this

You: for they have absolutely nothing to do with this matter

Stranger: Once again, "I" and secondly, your right, that was out of bounds, the ball now rests in your court.

You: ....WOW "your right, that was out of bounds, the ball now rests in your court."

You: see the problem there?

You: you're

Stranger: I see, I am terribly sorry about that...but "see the problem there?"

Stranger: *See the problem there?

You: nope

Stranger: Yep

You: that's consistency on my part, friend

You: i have yet to capitalize the first letter in the first word of any of my statements

Stranger: Consistency doesn't make it correct, and I'm not your friend, buddy.

You: you are a blatant retard.

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Impatience

Omegle conversation log

2011-01-07

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.

You: hi

Stranger: hi

Stranger: m/f??/

You: f

Stranger: from?

You: no

You: stop asking the questions

You: let me get one

You: m/f?

Stranger: kk

Stranger: m

You: fucking nosy

You: ok now you go

You: ....

Stranger: where?

You: my god you're retarded

You: go

You: as in

You: ask another question

Stranger: ok

You: fuck. if i was a real woman i don't think i'd bother staying with a moron such as yourself

Stranger: you like sex chat????????

You: um sure

Stranger: ok start

You: um ok

You: coitus

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Placing an Order

Omegle conversation log

2011-01-05

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.

You: my climax reaches as my penis reaches its maximum hardness potential and makes jizz come forthwith flowing all over the place as i finish placing the order by confirming it by on final click of the mouse

You: hi

Stranger: girl

Stranger: here

You: nice

Stranger: ;)

You: ikr

Stranger: horny?

You: um yes why not

Stranger: ik i am

You: but we can't have intercourse via internet

Stranger: :)

You: :D

Stranger: sex

Stranger: chat

You: you had me at sex

You: btw dont you want to know what i was ordering?

You: the complete first season of hannah montana on dvd ;)

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

This person was totally a guy posing as a woman. Who does that? ;)

Btw happy new year.